Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
