beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
