She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
