I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
why does every cop we meet know your name?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
