Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
