It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
is wine microwaveable?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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