Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
