I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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