yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
