Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
