Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
