I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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