Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
