just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
