id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
