Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
