sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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