how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
