I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
