don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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