it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
