??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
