apparently the secret to your success is patron
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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