Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
