I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
