we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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