Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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