he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
