I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
