I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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