CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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