Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize
