Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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