um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
