carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
