Jerry, you need to find god
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
