Me. At least after what I've been through.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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