Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
