why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
