I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize