Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
