I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
