i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
cat food counts as protein by the way
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
