sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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