So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
We need to rekindle our bromance
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
