handjob tips. give me some.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
