A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
