its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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