You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
