That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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