Jerry, you need to find god
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize
